New Choices, Better Plot Twists

When we let go of how we think it should go, and dare to make new choices, life shows up with even better surprises. Like it did for me this weekend at the LA Festival of Books.

Over the weekend, I went to the Los Angeles Festival of Books. It was inspiring and got me bursting with ideas for my upcoming book, How to Handle Anything.

I hadn’t been to this festival before and didn’t really know what to expect. I checked out the schedule, noted a few authors I wanted to see, and flagged some sessions that sounded interesting. Like an improviser stepping into a scene - maybe with an idea of the character they’ll play or what might happen — only to be met with unexpected gifts, I went into the festival with loose plans that quickly unraveled.

First, finding the parking area and entrance took so much extra time that I missed the first session I had hoped to attend: actress and writer Jenny Slate on the main stage. I did make it just in time to catch part of Wilmer Valderrama’s discussion instead.

That '70s Show anyone?

After Wilmer’s talk, I wandered around and realized Jenny Slate was still around, signing books. To be fair, I didn’t even know there’d be book signings (perhaps, reflects that I hadn’t been to a book festival like this before). Hopeful and curious, I hurried to the signing line, only to find out they had just cut it off.

“Okay,” I thought. Onto the next thing.

Magi and I continued exploring the festival, spinning a prize wheel (where we scored $5 toward any book… an improvised gift in itself!) and browsing booths, until we stumbled upon...

A tent for a local bookstore — selling Jenny Slate’s books — with a little sign that said she’d be back in about an hour to sign copies.

Sometimes the things you least suspect happen when you don’t expect them.

I share this story not to fangirl (though, maybe a little), but to illustrate improvisation in real life. We don’t actually know how something is going to turn out until it does.

I thought I had missed the chance to meet Jenny. I didn’t stress or cling to the outcome. I just kept moving through the day, moment by moment, scene by scene. And sure enough, another opportunity popped up. Had I not had those delays, maybe I would’ve missed out on that $5 book, or this cute photo opp with Magi.

One of us understood the assignment 😆

There’s something magical about believing things will work out — even if they don’t unfold the way we thought they would.

Later that afternoon, back home with more books stacked on my shelves, I revisited a book by

Jen Sincero

and stumbled upon a note I had marked:

You can’t experience new lands from the confines of your comfort zone.

This reminded me: in improv, one of the guiding principles is “If it feels weird, do it!” Improv thrives on doing the unusual thing.

And you know what else happens when we make a weird, new choice in our lives?

We grow. We experience something new.

If you want new results, you have to make new choices.

Improv gives us a low-stakes, playful environment to practice those new choices — whether it’s trying out new thoughts, beliefs, or actions — so that when life presents real challenges, our nervous system doesn’t freak out.

Just like:

• Musicians practice before a concert.

• Athletes train before the big game.

• Actors rehearse before opening night.

If you want to improvise better in life (adapt, communicate clearly, make decisions with limited information, navigate uncertainty with humor), practice improvising. When you improvise you get to practice making those new, and often uncomfortable, choices, so that they don’t feel so new or uncomfortable IRL.

For example:

• Playing a character that really believes in themselves and everything they do.

• Thinking something is possible (and therefore taking the actions that make it more likely to happen)

• Taking action, when someone does something you don’t like, saying something, versus cowering away.

Here are four steps you can try this week to make a new choice:

1. Pick an area where you feel stuck or have a desire. (Maybe it’s spending more time with friends or making more money.)

2. Identify what traits, beliefs, and actions someone with those results might have. (Someone who spends more time with friends probably says yes to invitations or initiates get-togethers. Someone who makes more money likely believes they’re worthy of earning more and takes bold steps.)

3. Choose one new trait, belief, or action to practice this week. Just one. Each morning, step into that “character” — maybe by saying something like, “I enjoy spending time with friends” or “I’m capable of making more money.”

4. Notice the internal and external impacts. How do you feel? What happens around you?

Trying on new character traits isn’t just for improv stages — it’s something you can do in your real life too.

If you want a place to practice, I’m excited to invite you to our upcoming 6-week intentional improv class kicking off May 5th! Here’s more info and registration.

☺

Announcements:

🎭 How to Handle Anything Virtual Improv Class

• Starts May 5th – runs for 6 weeks through June 9th

• Live, virtual sessions every Sunday 1-2 pm Pacific (4-5 pm Eastern, 3-4 pm Central, 2-3 pm Mountain)

• Replays and recaps available

• Register here (Registration deadline is May 3rd!)

• Special Substack contest! When you register mention you heard about it through Substack, and one person will win a signed copy of Jenny Slate’s new book Lifeform.

🧠 May = Mental Health Awareness Month!

Each Monday at 11 am PT, join me live on Substack for improv-inspired mental health techniques. We'll explore themes like self-compassion, creativity, patience, confidence, and gratitude — all key to mental health hygiene.

Subscribe to get updates and recaps if you miss the live!

---

For Paid Subscribers:

Here’s this week’s live session replay, where I share more about making new choices to create new results.